Wednesday, 3 August 2011

How do I sleep in a chair?

I have often been asked advice on such matters as such like and thus, but this week I am going to answer a query from a local person who I have been interacting with therefor whom within the environment of the street local to my own adobe.

This person, whom wished to remain anonymous, question was:

"sometimes I'm just too tired to go to bed at night, and have been thinking about sleeping in my arm chair. How would I go about doing this?"

That's a very interesting question that I would have very much enjoyed answering for my local fellow inhabitant of my local area, but I was in a hurry to rush home and sit down and write a blog post about arm chairs instead.

Firstly we need to know what an arm chair is.

This is not a chair. It is a stool, and consequently it is most unsuitable for sleeping in.

This is a chair, but it is only suitable for seating in, not sleeping in (or on depending on your political personification. 

This is much more like thus the item of furniture that we was discussing just outside the happy shopper.

Instructions for use:

  1. Sit in the chair
  2. Read a book, or watch a television. (it doesn't matter what kind, Sony, Phillips, Samsung even)
  3. Wait until you are tired.
  5. When you feel yourself drifting off to sleep let yourself go.
  6. Now get a cloth from the kitchen and clean the chair.
  7. Once chair is dry again, re-enter it and repeat process 1 - 4
  8. Wake up next morning any make appointment with a chiropractor. 


  1. Masterclasses yet! Is there no derrière to your talents, Leornad? My last chairopractor advised me to restuff my sofa after my many nights on self same had taken their toll. Unfortunately, a near miss with Yellow Pages resulted in a confused visit to a taxidermist, when what I discovered later an upholsterer ought to have been the target, with mildly amusing consequences (though not so much for the cat).

  2. I hate taxidermists. Just when you think you've got enough for that special set of gel pens, they swoop in and take all your money (well, it feels like all of it!). Bastards!

  3. Only a sane person would sleep in a bed, with eyotion cotton bedding (due to allergies).