Introducing a new comic book adventure...

I have been working very hard on my latest project, which is a comic book project about a worm called Woody, or as most people who have now read this will no him as, Woody Worm. In this adventure, which is illustrated in a unique style that has never been done before (all completed by using hands for instance) he has a very strange case of a missing bird table thief to find out about and see where he might be hiding so he can then reveal where he has been hiding and report to the appropriate authorities. BUT! The story has a unique twist which has never been done before on the pages of the web, the thief is in fact - a WOMAN!

This hilarious comic strip was design for a paying customer, who has had numerous problems with his mobile phone ever since I sent him the rough version of this exclusive story. He is unable to answer his phone from anyone who uses the same network that I use. Most frustrating!

I sent him an email demanding payment, or I would publish the cartoon on my website instead, and he did not respond. So here's it is. The woman with pink hair is his mother, BTW. Now she won't get her hilarious and unique birthday gift, and there loss is you're gain, dear readership of this thus blog/website.

If you'd like your family immorallised in a cartoon form, then please get in touch.

I can also draw snails quite well.

Chaos in the kitchen.

Those of you who have a kitchen in their house will be familiar with the problem of how to store a selection of fruit squashes, even if you don't enjoy a refreshing glass of fruit squash yourself, you may want to have some available if you have visitors and suchlike. Not everyone likes to drink tea or coffee (those are easy to organise into tea caddies and coffee jars anyway, so don't require an article here anyway).

The solution that I have developed after many years of fruit squash "oh I think I have some somewhere" situation, is to have the various bottles on display in my kitchen on the kitchen side. To avoid the chaos of not knowing which fruit squash is which, I have attached labels to the wall behind them. For instance, 1. is Londis Orange squash 2. is Lime Cordial 3. is Apple & Blackcurrent and 4. is orange squash from a posh supermarket without E numbers (unopened).

Hilarious Speed Camera Cartoon.

I had the idea for this cartoon while I was sitting in my dining room this morning, eating some toast. I was looking at the BBC news website and I was reading a story about how they have removed all the speed cameras in Oxfordshire, allowing everyone to drive at whatever speed they now choose to! Now the police are complaining that people are driving too fast! Of course people are going to drive too fast. That's why they buy cars that go fast, over something like a bicycle, which doesn't go very fast.

I showed this cartoon to my children, and they thought it was very funny and that I should send it to the BBC, they might show it on the BBC breakfast news programme or something. I emailed it this morning, but I'm still waiting to hear when I'll be invited onto the famous sofa to discuss my latest mastertory piece.

The Rejection Section

Hears the first cartoon in the new feature I thought of for this blog - The Rejection Section ©. This cartoon was sent to over 8 different publications, and yet surprisingly, despite the fact it's been specially 'hand shaded' they all rejected it. Well, I'd like to be able to say they rejected it, but the fact is - they ignored it. How very rude! That's 8 more publications that are on my shit list.

The way things appear to be going, there's only going to be Smash Hits magazine, and MotorHome Monthly left to accept my hilarious cartoons.

If you know of a publication that deserves the chance to publish my unique humourous cartoons, then please let me know. The local post office to be has quite a limited range of periodicals, and Mrs Braithwaite gets a bit upitty if I spend too long fingering her glossies.

Handy finger insertion (3)

In the final tutorial of this short tutorials on how to draw hands for your cartoon charactures, we are going to explore with the pointed finger or 'the wiggle' as some cartoonist call it. This can be a very important techique to give your characture a realistic and believable relationship with other charactures in your drawings. It can also help if a characture is able to point at something that isn't as obvious as it should be, or just needs to press a button (such as in Robot cartoons and the thus suchlike).

Hand it 2.

In the secone tutorial in this series of how to draw hands in your cartoons, we are looking at how to drawer a hand that is grasping something very firmly. This can often be a very useful ability to have, particularly if you are illustrating a survival skills newsletter, or a boy scout manual, for instance.

As you can see it's very easy to do once you get used to it, it'll be second nature and you'll be doing this without even thinking about it, until your tea is ready. Just be careful not to stay up all night doing this, as you'll exhaust yourself in next to no time.

Instructions for hands.

I'm often asked how do I draw hands when I'm drawing my cartoons. Well, here is the first of many tutorials on drawing hands. We'll start with a 'grabbing' hand, or 'clutching' hand, which can be very important when drawing talent free cartoons such as thus:

Hairy wrists are entirely optional, and probably not appropriate if you are drawing a cartoon of a grasping woman, for instance.